Love, Growth, and Running My Own Race
My 4 biggest lessons from life in the Northern Rivers, as told by a Scorpio Moon.
Six weeks ago, I packed up my life in the Northern Rivers and headed south for a change of scene.
I’ve never been much of a big city girl, but a smaller city right by the ocean, with warm weather and my adorable baby nephew? That, I can handle.
It’s hard to believe it’s been four years since I moved to the Northern Rivers. At the time, I was in the middle of a personal crisis. My health was at an all-time low. I’d been living in Brisbane, climbing the corporate ladder, and drowning in the soul-crushing truth that I hated how I was spending this precious life.
Chronic Fatigue had taken hold of me, and I was dealing with debilitating headaches and vision problems—symptoms that, at their worst, kept me in bed for days on end. The doctors said I needed brain surgery (my second, the first being at 14) to address these issues.
I was terrified of the surgery, but more so, of staying stuck. Deep down, I knew my physical health was the symptom, not the problem—it was my body screaming at me to change. So, after much back and forth, I made a decision: I canceled the surgery and gave myself permission to rest. Spoiler alert: the headaches eased, my vision improved, and my Chronic Fatigue began to fade. I started to heal.
And what did healing look like? It looked like moving to the Northern Rivers, spending time in the sun, in nature, visiting farmers markets, eating well, connecting with free thinkers living intentional and creative lives, and building a life that felt aligned with who I was. That’s not to say it was easy. Those years were an initiation—physically, emotionally, and spiritually. But they were also transformative.
During that time, I earned my Diploma in Kinesiology, gained clarity about my purpose, and traversed lessons I’ll carry forever.
Here are my 4 from 4: four lessons life taught me during my time on Bundjalung Land.
Life is an endless cycle of death and rebirth. There’s no need to panic.
Let me tell you, though—as someone who’s had my share of emotional lows, I used to panic. I didn’t see these cycles as part of transformation, so I couldn’t find purpose in them. Instead, I felt victimised by the universe, powerless over my emotional suffering, and terrified that I’d be stuck there forever.
But as we know, nature shows us the truth. Life moves in seasons. Death and rebirth are always going to be a part of that. I remember exactly where I was sitting the moment this realisation sunk in, accompanied by the immediate thought: Why did no one lay this out for me? The wisdom and initiations we’ve lost in Western society—that’s another conversation entirely.
Once I realised that these death phases are inevitable and natural, I found a profound sense of peace. They don’t last forever. The fear started to fade, replaced by a quiet wisdom: when we stop resisting these cycles, they can unfold with grace. The pain lessens, and the lessons emerge sooner.
And here’s something practical: when you’re in the middle of a “death” phase, that’s when habits and discipline matter most. Keep it simple. Go for a short walk. Put your hands in the dirt. Pull some weeds. Water your garden. Feel the sun on your face. These small acts of grounding bring life back to the body and spirit.
Liz Greene said it perfectly:
"There are many kinds of deaths, and most of them are not physical. Every death is followed inevitably by a rebirth because it is only the form, and not the life which inherits the form, that dies."
How to Have a Healthy Relationship with My Emotions
This might sound simple to some, but as a Scorpio Moon, I’ve had to put in the hard yards to cultivate a healthy relationship with my emotions. Deep feeling is such a gift, but let’s be real—it takes real skill to manage. I see this so often in my clinic: those of us who feel deeply have to learn how to channel that intensity into something constructive.
The first step for me was learning to accept my emotions and allow myself to feel them fully. For years, I told myself I didn’t have the right to feel deep emotional suffering because, on paper, I’d “had a pretty good life” and my pain wasn’t “justified.” But once I let go of that story, I was able to embrace my emotions for what they were—valid, human, and necessary. That shift allowed them to transmute into something more helpful, rather than keeping me stuck.
Now, my self-talk sounds like this: My emotions are valid. They don’t scare me. I can hold them. I can feel them. They will pass.
Once I mastered this foundation of acceptance, I was able to take my power back. Instead of letting my emotions bubble over and overwhelm me at inconvenient times, I learned to set them aside temporarily, knowing I will return to them later with intention and space. It’s not about avoiding emotions—I can now honouring them on my terms.
Take 100% Responsibility for Everything (Even When It’s Not Your Fault)
This one is all about reclaiming your power. The moment I hear my mind say, “He, she, or it did this to me,” I know I’ve handed my power over to something outside of myself. For me, being in my power means remembering that I always have the capacity to choose my state of being—no matter what’s happening around me.
Taking full responsibility for everything in our life is a gift. Why? Because from this place, we can intentionally shape our own future. Even in moments where I was treated unfairly, unkindly, or even victimised, I’ve learned to ask myself: What vibration was I in that called this situation into my life? This isn’t about self-blame—it’s about self-awareness. When I take responsibility for my role, I can uncover the lesson and use it to grow.
Our soul is always calling us to heal and evolve, which is why we experience repeating patterns, often ones we’d rather avoid, until we finally get the message. When we take full ownership of our lives and actively seek out the lessons, we stop running in circles and start stepping into the highest version of ourselves.
The truth is, no one else is coming to save us. We all face challenging situations, but the power to shift and grow lies entirely within us. If we keep outsourcing our power—waiting for someone else to change, fix, or rescue us—we’ll be waiting forever.
Love Yourself & Run Your Own Race
I have deep compassion for this one. Knowing and truly loving yourself is essential to avoid the comparison trap.
We live in an era where the long-term effects of social media are still unfolding, but what I can say for sure is that I’ve seen it cause immense suffering—whether you’re the one doing the influencing or the one being influenced.
On my path to true self love and acceptance, there were always parts of me battling comparison. I’d look at my life and think, “By age X, I should have Y because they do.” Or, “Why don’t I live in Bora Bora? Lol.
Although I’ve always preferred to do things my way rather than follow the crowd, I’m not immune. The most liberating decision I made this year was to delete social media for periods of time. It’s amazing how much mental space and energy it freed up.
I’ve also been deeply impacted witnessing the ways that presenting a carefully curated image online can trap one in their suffering longer than necessary. The fear of losing validation or followers—and having to confront the vulnerabilities lurking beneath that—can be just as crippling as idolising random strangers on the internet.
At the end of the day, we’re all just walking each other home. (Ram Dass)
As I close this little love letter, I want to leave you with a quote that sums up where I’m at:
“Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.”
— Maya Angelou
With deep gratitude to the incredible Bundjalung Land and its elders, past, present, and emerging, I leave the Northern Rivers feeling successful, grounded, and more at peace with my own journey.